doctors appointments and such

(I am obviously smiling about her rolls here, and not the impending doom)

Sweet Lucille had a doctors appointment last week. Seven months of motherhood and I am noticing a pattern the week prior – nerves. It’s the shots mostly – they catch her off guard. I mean seriously, a stranger wins you over for about 15 minutes of cooing, and playing, and complimenting your proportions, perfect head shape, sitting posture, how chill you are. And the next thing you know, she sends in a friend you think you can now also trust – who sticks you with needles several times and runs away. Who wouldn’t feel like crying? Especially when you look at the person you think is supposed to protect you, and she’s helping the stranger hold you still. Betrayal.

So there’s the nerves about the shots. But there’s also the unavoidable insecurity. I end up second guessing everything I do as a mother, and assume the doctor is going to tell me I’ve had it all wrong since our last appointment. And there were more things to mess up this time – solids, sunscreen, schedules – all the things I guess at (with the exception of sunscreen), and fumble through. I was convinced she was going to tell me Lucille was way too chubby and way too tan – despite my slathering her with 50 spf. Which is completely ridiculous because it’s possible I have the sweetest doctor practicing pediatric medicine. Heather must have reassured me 20 times prior to the appointment that she would absolutely not criticize me, then after meeting Dr. M, turned to me later and incredulously asked “did you really, HONESTLY think that doctor was going to give you a hard time?!”

She had nothing but praise for Luce, and said multiple times I was doing a great job – putting my nerves at bay until the next appointment of course. ;)

how she later felt about my betrayal ^^

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3 thoughts on “doctors appointments and such

  1. OMG. Those rolls! She is seriously a doll…one of the cutest babies I have EVER seen.

    To be honest, from my corner of the Internet it seems like you’re doing so well with everything. You are doing a great job. I second-guess the shots every. single. time., and it is so exhausting! Ugh!

  2. Oh, Holly!! Lucille has the perfect mother for her. Why else would God have given her to you? God knew what he was doing and Lucy is obviously thriving! Cut yourself some slack!! You are a wonderful mother!

  3. Kelsey! Thank you so much – it’s really appreciated. :) Seriously, those words of affirmation are my love language, and are so good for my confidence. I feel like you’re paving the way for me (in that funny, awesome, through-the-internet kind of way), so thanks for that! :)

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